I applied for two relatively senior roles that I saw advertised within a few days of each other (I haven't applied for anything else for a long time). The selection processes have tracked in tandem, with first, second and third interviews all running on the same or adjacent days. It wasn't until the third interview - for both - that I really got interested in either or started to see myself "fitting" with either role.
Both recruiters know where I am up to with the other role (and always have).
To my surprise I'm now preferred candidate for both. I have a further round of interviews plus reference checks to go with both.
So here's the question - at this stage it is not improbable that I will have a choice of roles, and will obviously have to decline one. Given the time that both companies have invested in me, including people at very senior levels, and given that there has been an obvious rapport during interviews, I would like to not just give the verbal 'no' via the recruiter, but to write to the people who interviewed me, thank them for their time, and wish them well. To me, this feels polite, appropriate, respectful and grown up - but I would like a second opinion.
What do you think?
I should add that I feel a little guilty about wasting so much time of one of the companies - but in reality I know I've tried to act with integrity and that me looking at multiple roles is as "common sense" as them looking at multiple candidates. I have absolutely no intention of playing one company off the other to improve an offer. My goal is to come away with a job offer AND a good reputation and the knowledge and comfort that I've conducted myself in a way that is in line with my values.
No answer but a reminder
Sounds like you have some wonderful opportunities here. Remember that "until you have something, you have nothing." Focus on getting both offers then decide how to handle it. I wish I had more experience with this but must defer to more knowledgeable managers.
Thanks! I'm definitely
Thanks! I'm definitely trying to get both offers - right now I have nothing, and being preferred candidate could mean nothing more than the person whose head gets messed with the most (!). A "likely" offer from one is not a reason to do anything less than my best on the other.
In the meantime I feel it's important to scenario plan so that I've got the goal in sight and am not caught short when the phone rings. I need to be very clear in my own head on what I want to have at the end of this, both in terms of measurable outcomes (an appropriate offer from my preferred employer) and less measurable outcomes (around reputation and values).
Since starting this reply, I just remembered - the Manager Tools Interviewing Series - DOH! I've had a look through the "How to Handle Offers" notes (and will listen to the cast shortly) and it answered my question. It's also been reassuring because I think that generally, my thinking and planning is on track. Thanks Mike and Mark, you are legends - you already answered!